One week ago we found out that I wasn't pregnant (anymore?). That made me cry a lot. This morning I was almost as tearfull, because one week of letting go and eating comfort food and I've gained about everything I had lost in the past two months. I think this is very unfair. And we bought lottery tickets. Figuring that if we can't have the baby we should get the bucks. But no, not even a euro.
I need good stuff and fun things. I need to be invited for dinners and picknicks and parties. Including liberal amounts of wine. I need to have fun and laughter around me. I DO NOT need to eat cucumbers and lettuce and water. I need to cook dinner for my friends and family and buy some ridiculously expensive new equipment to prepare it with. And a new house. With a back yard.
The universe is not working properly and it needs to get it's act together. Therefor I have made a list of demands...
Dear universe,
You have failed, again, to fix me and too many of my fellow infertiles up with a Big Fat Positive. By now, I assume it is just not in your power to make this happen. I am really a bit dissapointed, because frankly, I thought you would be up for the job.
However, I suggest compensation. Mind you, this is no pick and choose, all of the following demands must be met.
All my lovely infertile friends and me who had a BFN will:
Thank you very much for arranging this within a week.
Kind regards,
Broedkipje
I need good stuff and fun things. I need to be invited for dinners and picknicks and parties. Including liberal amounts of wine. I need to have fun and laughter around me. I DO NOT need to eat cucumbers and lettuce and water. I need to cook dinner for my friends and family and buy some ridiculously expensive new equipment to prepare it with. And a new house. With a back yard.
The universe is not working properly and it needs to get it's act together. Therefor I have made a list of demands...
Dear universe,
You have failed, again, to fix me and too many of my fellow infertiles up with a Big Fat Positive. By now, I assume it is just not in your power to make this happen. I am really a bit dissapointed, because frankly, I thought you would be up for the job.
However, I suggest compensation. Mind you, this is no pick and choose, all of the following demands must be met.
All my lovely infertile friends and me who had a BFN will:
- have the ability to eat unlimited comfortfood for a week after a BFN and still loose a kilo (or two).
- get an invitation to a fabulous party where no one will be pregnant or talk about children.
- find a winning lottery ticket for at least the amount of an all inclusive IVF/ICSI/IUI/etc cycle PLUS enough to make a week long luxury trip to a tropical island with white beaches and fancy drinks with little paper umbrella's
- have no zit's, cramps or other AF-related pains for 3 months
- be offered business class spontaneously when flying
- have no stressy work issues for a minimum of 2 weeks, but plenty fun distractions
- find a bargain but excellent new house if they want to.
Thank you very much for arranging this within a week.
Kind regards,
Broedkipje
No comments:
Post a Comment